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When Cindy's not writing her awesome blogs and book reviews for Lesbiatopia, she's doing artsy-fartsy thingys in her studio, being a kick-ass pro-choice activist, cheering for the NY Jets, and filling the role of rad co-worker :)

Show some love to C-Rod: R4R's biggest fan!

Making lemonade.

I'm always the LAST to post everything (hey, I never claimed to be CNN here!), but I finally sat my tush down and watched the Proposition 8 Musical video that's been going around for the past couple weeks.

Two words: Hil Arious!

That's why I love my fellow liberals - when we experience setbacks we get upset...but then we just make our opponents look like total ass-clowns :)

See more Jack Black videos at Funny or Die

Prop 8 pees on my parade.

I'm finally out of my Election Happiness Haze. Wow, what a week it's been!! For the first time in my adult life, I actually feel like things are going to be different.....and I'm so proud!

On a lousy note, Proposition 8 passed in California banning gay marriage statewide. My man, Keith Olbermann had this to say last night...

(get those tissues and prepare to swoon!)

Vote, baby, VOTE!

Just cast my ballot - who knew I'd be so peppy getting up at the ass-crack of dawn!

My friend and I were giddy as we left our polling place - maybe we're just nerds, but there's this feeling of pride and accomplishment we both shared. It's amazing how such a small (almost anti-climactic) action of pressing a few buttons can mean so much.

That's why I get so fucking angry when people get on their soapboxes about how "lame" or "pointless" voting is. What pisses me off most of all is the fact that these people are as fed up with the status quo as I am - yet, they snub the most important step they can take to try and change it. Sure, our system is far from perfect - but how is refusing to participate in it going to fix anything? As far as I'm concerned: if you didn't vote, you can't bitch. I bitched about Bush for EIGHT YEARS - because I didn't vote for him either time, and I was pissed. If you aren't happy with something, raise your voice and use the vehicles you have to show your disapproval! Get involved in your community, organizations, movements to bring about change when we're not in an election year. DO SOMETHING! Even if it's just writing a freakin' blog you think no one reads - you're at least getting your thoughts and your message out there.

I'm sick of the whole: "I'm too annoyed and cynical to vote. I'm so much better than you idealistic losers who think it's going to make a difference. I waste my breath telling you how angry I am, but I'm not going to do anything about it."

Get the fuck over yourselves.

Women's health gets fingered...

I frantically searched for this Daily Show segment after it aired last night - but alas, I had to wait until this morning.

Rock on, Samantha Bee.

Sharp Dressed (Wo)man.

By now, you've probably heard about paper doll Sarah Palin's shopping sprees. Reports show the RNC has spent over $150,000 on clothing, hair and makeup for the VP candidate's appearances on the campaign trail. Cause really - who cares what asinine crap comes out of her mouth as long as she looks good? Props to CNN's Campbell Brown for addressing this on the air:



I feel it's as obvious as ever why Johnny picked Palin as his running mate: there's been too much talk about the Republican party equating to rich, crusty old white men. Sooooo....let's incorporate some CHANGE (cause that's what all the hip kids are saying these days) and put a rich, young white WOMAN in the public eye! Oh, they'll eat that up! But she has to be hot - we don't want some post-menopausal hag - women don't want to be that and men don't want to look at that. Who cares what her creds are - she's got peeps to write her speeches for her (just make sure we keep her away from unscripted questions from the media - people might actually find out she's stupid).

Another reason Sarah Palin is an asshole.

This is a short but really powerful ad put out by WAMP (Women Against McCain-Palin)...

Election bitchin'

I think I've officially overdosed on CNN. But like all other narcotics, I can't seem to stop. Ahhh.....it's that time of year again - the presidential debates are my play-offs, and election night is my Superbowl. I'm psyched and pretty damn geared up - probably because I'm so fucking angry.

Now, it's no secret I'm a feminist and I fully support and love seeing women aiming for places that not too long ago were reserved for men only. HOWEVER, I loathe Sarah Palin. That's probably no surprise, either - most feminists do. What the hell was Johnny thinking?! I remember seeing the announcement on TV - I was in California with a friend of mine (also a CNN junkie). After a lot of screaming and obscenities, I said the political move was like when someone brings in doughnuts to the office, and that weird guy from the copy room takes a bite out of one and puts it back in the box. COME ON!! Who are you fooling?? McCain's obviously trying to appeal to all the bitter Hillary voters by choosing a young, spunky woman as his running mate.....but with a little research, any intelligent human being can see that Sarah Palin is no Hillary Clinton! Quite the opposite, actually - in more ways than party lines. Palin is hardcore pro-life - even in cases of rape and incest. While governor of Alaska, she passed a law that requires rape victims to pay for their own rape kits for further investigation! Now, I understand the pro-life rhetoric of "taking responsibility" and blah blah blah (because humans are perfect, of course, and choice is such a black and white issue), but no one asks to be raped - what has the victim done that can be considered "irresponsible?"

And what kind of experience does this woman have that could make her a viable candidate for the vice presidency?? Yeah, she was a governor, but Hillary Clinton has been in the Senate for years - not to mention a former First Lady.

And the winking!!!!

Then there's Bristol - her 17 year old prego daughter and the product of abstinence-only sex education (see how well that works!). McCain/Palin supporters came down hard on the media for bringing the minor into the spotlight. However, isn't Palin's view on birth control and contraception kind of OUR business, when she's in the running to be influential on those issues?

The Republicans fought back big time, bringing up Obama's "connection" to Bill Ayers, a former anti-war activist/domestic terrorist during the Vietnam War. The two served on a board together in Illinois - way after Ayers' violent past, which was in it's heyday when Obama was only 8 years old. Ayers is now a college professor and a model citizen....but we should all see Obama as an American-hating terrorist?? Puhleeze. What I want to know is why doesn't anyone point out that McCain left his invalid wife for Cindy, his mistress? What a great Christian!

The fight has gotten ugly. Every McCain ad I've seen and heard recently is all about how awful Obama is - and I'm glad the Obama camp is taking the high road and focusing on how he would be the best choice - not simply mudslinging back at McCain. What makes me so pissed above everything else is the ignorance, hatred, fear, and racism McCain's campaign has fueled by throwing around words like "terrorist" - obviously stirring up visions of Osama Bin Ladin and 9/11.

SO - this is just the foam on top of my cappuccino of frustration. I'm sure there will be more to come in the next few weeks...when I can think more clearly and I don't find it difficult to come up with cohesive sentences.

Republicans: Making their party proud since….uh....hmm....

A vendor thought it would be a swell idea to sell this nausea-inducing pin at the Texas state GOP convention last week:

“If Obama is President will we still call it the White House?”

Apparently, the Republican Party has not halted production or sales of the pin - or even saying anything about it at all. Yet, its movers and shakers are still talking the talk of how we need lovely things like unity, using such choice-words as “colorblind.”

PPPPPFFFFFFFTTTTTT!!!

How about vocally disapproving of racism when you see it - especially in your own party?!

Thanks to Chris V on DigitalJournal for original posting.

A little wake-up call...

I know four days equals “old news,” but I still feel the need to address Hillary’s June 7th concession from the presidential race.

To all her supporters: Ok, so all our hard work and unyielding faith has not produced the outcome we wanted (sigh). But, there’s no use wasting our time bitching about what could have been – now, we need to work with what we’ve got. I think most dems forgot they were technically on the same side – let’s remind ourselves of that. And in the meantime, rally together so we can finally celebrate some good news come November. I know I sure as hell don’t want McCain running the Oval Office, or my ovaries. (How’s that for alliteration?)

I know it stinks to lose something you’ve worked so hard for and wanted so badly, but it happens. Regardless of the outcome, Hillary has already made history in her campaign for the presidency. Thanks to her, children today have seen a strong woman push for the most coveted seat at the table. And all hope is not lost – there’s still a chance Obama could choose Hillary as his Vice. And how awesome would that be?

So, in conclusion: instead of whining like a child whose mommy wouldn’t buy them a candy bar at the Pick ‘n Save, get off your butts and start remembering why you’re activists – and what’s at stake if we continue to bicker amongst ourselves.

I went away, but sexism didn't!

So, I took a “hiatus,” which I never intended to turn into a hiatus – then I remembered the other day that I used to have this blog thing that I would post to religiously, even if no one read it except a few interested friends, but I would keep up with it in hopes of it being discovered by literate people across the country, who would visit it daily and thoroughly enjoy my ideas and writing style…

Yeah, I was referring to this blog.

Anyway, I hope that I will never abandon you again, R4R, and will no longer put off sharing my thoughts, ideas and pet peeves with all 3 of my lovely readers…

Ha :)

Well, what better way to get my ass kicked back into gear than to hear that – golly, gee – sexism is alive and well!

Campbell Leaper (professor of psychology at UC Santa Cruz) and Christia Spears Brown (assistant professor of psychology at the University of Kentucky) conducted a study of 600 girls, ages 12-18 from California and Georgia. The results: 90% of girls today experience sexual harassment and sexism. Nine out of ten!!! And we should shut up about feminism ‘cause we’ve come so far…

Riiiiight.

"Sexual harassment included receiving inappropriate and unwanted romantic attention, hearing demeaning gender-related comments, being teased about their appearance, receiving unwanted physical contact, and being teased, bullied, or threatened with harm by a male. "Our findings on sexual harassment are, sadly, consistent with previous research," said Leaper. "But on the other hand, most girls said they'd experienced sexual harassment at least once, as opposed to several times."

Leaper and Brown were curious to learn what environmental factors attributed to how a female recognizes sexism (if at all). Their study showed that girls who were familiar with feminism were more likely to identify sexism than girls who were not. In addition, girls who felt pressure to conform to traditional femininity (whether from parents, teachers, coaches or peers) were also more likely to recognize sexism.

Leaper relates this correlation to society’s awareness of racism – acknowledging its existence shows one’s disapproval. "In order to recognize sexism," she said. "You probably have to believe it's wrong."

But Leaper points out that being aware of sexism doesn't predispose girls to over-report it.

"We know from previous studies that people tend to under-report discrimination," said Leaper. "After Anita Hill, reports of sexual harassment increased dramatically in the United States, because it gave people a label for their experience. So, if anything, sexism is probably occurring more than the girls in this study are saying it is."

The scariest part of this news is being reminded that many people out there still don’t believe sexism exists, and that it’s perfectly normal to demand men and women adhere to traditional gender roles – and those who resist should be punished. "Doing Gender" has become so normalized, it’s difficult for people to re-train their thinking – even when they’re aware of sexism, homophobia, etc. It’s the little slips that send a wave of embarrassment once they’re uttered. "Did I just say that?!"

A friend of mine teaches women’s studies and history at our alma mater, and thoroughly enjoys being part of students’ discovery of how women’s roles have changed (and yet not) through time. She tells me with excitement how the undergrads seem to "get it" – they can see how certain behavior is degrading, and its purpose should be questioned – but then someone will call a woman a bitch or a whore for no good reason – just that they got nothin’ else to work with…

Fractured Fairy Tales

I’ve been sitting on this post for almost a month, and remembering that tomorrow is Valentine’s Day gave me a big enough kick in the ass to finish it...

My friend told me about a horrible movie she caught on TV recently - "Trust the Man." I haven't seen it, but apparently, these two couples are in miserable relationships (one guy is cheating on his wife, the other acts like a 15-year-old), yet at the end of the movie, all is forgiven and right in the world.

Sounds like every romantic comedy ever made (gag). Come to think of it, sounds like most sitcoms, too. No matter how intense the fights or how hurtful the actions, everything's hunky-dory in the end because someone magically changed between the Verizon and Tide commercials.

I started to think about all the crap I’ve seen on TV throughout my formative years – and I came to the conclusion that exposing yourself to enough of these scenarios eventually starts to erode any amount of common sense you may or may not have. Sure, I know it's only entertainment. After a stressful day at work, few would argue with watching a show/movie where the nice guys always win, love is always requited (even if not at first), and the bad guys always get what’s coming to them. Karma is alive and well on the screen. We talk to the characters, screaming, "What’s the matter with him?!" as we wait for the "tough guy" to crumble at the sight of his love interest – because she's such a "good" woman. He professes his emotions, maybe even sheds a tear. They embrace, share a perfect kiss, and the credits roll.

My friend and I talked about how damaging this can be for, particularly, the female psyche. Come on, we all know women (maybe even ourselves) who have at one time or another made excuses for absolutely horrible relationships because of such iron-clad excuses, like:

"Oh, he'll change because I'm a supportive girlfriend and I'm so good to him!"

Or the ever-famous:

"He was so wonderful before - I'm sure that side of him is still in there somewhere…"

We women are pretty good at internalizing and taking responsibility for other people’s bullshit. Popular media has this underlying rule that no matter how fucked up a guy is, if the woman is "good" enough or sacrifices enough, this will be his cure and will make him a decent human being. His life is in her hands, so to speak. If she can’t change him, well then she must not have tried hard enough – or she just wasn’t "good" enough.

Wow, I didn’t realize how fucked up that sounds when it’s written out. Seriously though, if someone has serious mental or social problems that were there before you and during you, they’re going to be there after you. It’s their deficiency, not yours. Stories like "Trust the Man" take the responsibility away from the man and put it completely on the woman. Now, it’s up to her to help him overcome his abusiveness/neglectfulness/immaturity/coldness...which is straight-up bullshit.

Banking on the other person to see the err of his or her ways just because you are a loving, supportive partner is not only a never-ending battle - it's a terrible way to live. As much as chick-flicks and sappy sitcoms like to show how people change, really they don't. And in the rare occasion where a person does a 180, it’s because they themselves felt the need/will/whathaveyou to change – not because they put you on a pedestal.

Of course, I don’t sit around and watch educational programming all freakin’ day – I like my crap-shows just as much as everyone else. Now, I’m just more of a cynical bitch while I watch ‘em. :)

On that note, Happy Valentine’s Day, and make sure your valentine is one that truly makes you happy – why would you want or deal with anything less?

Women's Studies exposed! (gasp)

There's been some shit-talking about the discipline of Women's Studies - mostly from David Horowitz in a November article for The Weekly Standard. In defense of non-traditional courses in higher education, I submitted a piece for RH Reality Check...check it out...

Toot My Horn....Wednesday...

I know - Tuesday sounds much better, but my newest piece for Rhrealitycheck.org was just published today.

It's what you get when you mix a study, sex-ed and Shelby Knox!